Lesson 24 - I Do Not Perceive My Own Best Interests

This lesson feels like a direct challenge to the ego: "I do not perceive my own best interests." It sounds simple enough, but really—do I not know what’s best for me? I’ve been looking after myself for so long, I thought I had most things figured out. But the truth is, my desires are often scattered and conflicting. Many times, the outcomes I believed would make me happy only left me feeling more confused.

The lesson is really a call to honesty. It asks me to admit that I don’t always know what will bring lasting happiness and peace. And honestly, I can see that clearly when I’m feeling disappointed about something going wrong. I’ve been looking after myself since I was 15, believing that if I didn’t, no one else would. But looking back, there are countless times when I thought I knew what I wanted, only to be left feeling empty when I got it.

To show how this lesson is playing out for me, let me share what’s been happening recently. I’ve been feeling stuck—feeling like I’m not contributing enough to the family finances because I don’t have a full-time job. I completed a course to become a virtual assistant, built a website, and started juggling different goals—wanting to land clients. On one hand, and then I think stable employment is more doable -- without the constant hustle, and I’ve been interviewing and actually landed a job. Success and recognition, right? But on the other hand, I crave balance and less stress. I want security, yet dream of freedom. These are not small, easily solvable conflicts. Every time I think I’ve figured out a plan, I hit a wall because I’m chasing completely opposite things at the same time.

On Day 24, the mind-searching exercise it recommends. I thought about my career, closed my eyes, and started listing all the outcomes I wanted: more money for the family, more clients, more free time, recognition, peace, financial security—the list just kept going. But as I wrote them down, I realised how many of my goals clashed. How could I expect less stress while chasing more clients? How could I want freedom and stability at once? No wonder I was feeling stuck!

After listing all these goals, the lesson asks you to conclude by saying: “I do not perceive my own best interests in this situation.” This was a moment of surrender for me. At first, it felt strange—like giving up control. But in reality, it was freeing. I could let go of trying to figure everything out on my own.

The Power of Letting Go

This is the beauty of the lesson: I don’t need to figure out all the answers. I don’t need to know exactly what I want, because in truth, I don’t. My desires are conflicted, my goals are scattered, and my ego-driven ambitions only add to the chaos. What I learned through this practice is that I need to trust that there’s a bigger picture—one I can’t always see. Instead of trying to control everything, I’m learning to step back and allow deeper guidance to lead me.

Now, this doesn’t mean I sit back and do nothing. It means I stop obsessing over the outcomes and forcing things to fit my conflicting goals. For me, the real work is in being honest about my confusion and opening my mind to other possibilities—ones I might not have considered.

An Ongoing Practice

I’m far from perfect, but this lesson has given me a powerful tool to check myself. When I notice that I’m feeling anxious or stuck—whether it’s about work, relationships, or everyday decisions—I take a step back and remind myself: “I do not perceive my own best interests in this situation.” It’s like hitting a mental reset button, creating space for a new perspective to enter.

This lesson has taught me that being open to not knowing is actually a strength. By admitting that I don’t have all the answers, I create space for something greater to guide me.

Surrender is the word.

Bibliography:

A Course in Miracles. Foundation for Inner Peace. A Course in Miracles: Combined Volume, 3rd Edition. Foundation for Inner Peace, 2007. URL: https://acim.org.